I love TED Talks, and this speech given at the 2010 TEDWomen conference struck me more than others. I wasn’t familiar with Tony Porter, but he’s “an educator and activist who is internationally recognized for his effort to end violence against women.”

This 11-minute speech touches on his personal experiences as a young man raised in the Bronx and also as a father raising a young son and daughter. He explains that the rampant mistreatment of women is directly related to our culture’s irresponsible and unrealistic expectations for young men, or what he refers to as the “Man Box.” The “Man Box” represents the rigid boundaries that we force upon young men. How they’re raised to hide from their emotions, always stay strong, and to treat women as objects and property.

Porter tells the story of once asking a 12-year-old boy how he would feel if his football coach told him, in front of his teammates, that he played like a girl. The young man responded that it would destroy him, which forced Porter to wonder, “if it would destroy him to be called a girl, what are we then teaching him about girls?”

Excellent point. And he makes several others during the talk. It’s definitely worth the watch.